How to Test Your Emotional Maturity

A Summary of the Video

The documentary video shows its viewers, the 3 methodologies, the 3 capacities and the 3 cardinal virtues that will examine, assess and emphasize their individual emotional maturity. Oftentimes the not, our emotional maturity and development does not go at pace with our physical growth. There are instances for example, that an individual is 30 years old in age and with its look on the outside, but is 25 years old in his or her impulses and emotions on the inside. A threshold of being an adult is based on his or her emotional maturity. A simple question can be asked to an adult upon the premise of assessing his or her emotional maturity on the inside and that is; “When someone on whom we depend on emotionally, lets us down, disappoints us and leaves us hanging and uncertain, what is our characteristic way of responding?” As a response to this question, there are three methodologies applied in order to assess the emotional maturity of an individual wherein the viewers can use to assess one’s self, in a scale of 1-10, in accordance to their respective propensities. 

The first methodology used in assessing an individual’s emotional maturity is; “We might sulk.” Some human individuals obtain a soft heart, that leads them also to have a fragile personality. In return, a human being who has a fragile personality and a soft heart, tends to sulk a lot when something is not given, when everything is not in agreement as to what he or she expects, and when anything is not done against his or her favor. As a result, this individual resorts to being emotionally immature by having tantrums, bursts out in anger and lives out a day by not finishing it with a transpired conflict with a specific person, thus lacking the maximal development of emotional maturity within. 

The second methodology used in assessing an individual’s emotional maturity is; “We might get furious.” It is by nature that human individuals get angry whenever everything is out of his or her control. The fury and rage that he or she feels inside, leads  the individual to be disappointed, vicious and on a larger scale, furious. The wanting to attack that source of anger in an abrupt manner, leads the individual to be emotionally immature, thus lacking the maximal development of emotional maturity within. 

The third methodology used in assessing an individual’s emotional maturity is; “We might go cold”. It is a hard dilemma for a human individual to show concern and care for the person who caused them to be hurt and to be in pain, despite the fact that the human individual’s life is in that person’s hands. The easiest route in dealing with such, is to create a wall and a barrier that will create a demarcation line of difference. Because of this wall and barrier of difference, we pretend to not feel and see how that person has shown us love, care and concern because we are covered with that feeling of dismay, hurt and prejudice over that person. Thus, the emotionally immature person, shuts out the door for reconnection and thus vividly shows that the maximal development of emotional maturity is not yet achieved by that particular individual. 

The three above mentioned methodologies lead the viewers to the 3 markers of capacities that show the attainment of an individual of maximal emotional maturity. 

First, an individual who has attained maximal emotional maturity has the capacity to explain. Simple as it may seem but it is difficult to explain whenever we are asked why we are upset with the person that upsets us. The emotionally mature individual is careful in his or her choice of words, as well as in the statements and facts that he or she will release, so that the person asking him or her, will offer the deserving understanding and listening ear that the affected person deserves. 

Second, an individual who has attained maximal emotional maturity has the capacity to stay calm. Amidst situations of being faced with conflicts, issues, controversies and problems, the emotionally mature person stays calm, at ease and in control of his or her emotions both in a responsible and dignified way. Self-assertion for the emotionally mature individual will always be down the line for him or her. Attaining this capacity would mean that the individual does not shout or attack immediately the perpetrator causing the chaotic scenario. Rather, he or she breathes normally in between, sets a light mood for discussion, states facts that would diagnose the root of the problem and come up with solutions in order to end the chaos that transpired within the perpetrator and the respondent. That is a trademark of an emotionally mature individual. 

Third, an individual who has attained maximal emotional maturity has the capacity to be vulnerable. Despite being hurt, the emotionally mature person still seeks for the help of the person who may have hurt him or her one time, in order to have a shoulder to cry on and to obtain a listening ear wherein he or she can pour out his or her inner sentiments and feelings. This would mean that despite the past experiences and events that they had before, he or she still bestows the trust to that person, whom he or she is confident with. Thus that person on the other hand, carries on the responsibility of keeping the transpired conversation confidential with the down troubled individual and at the same time, he or she regains the friendship and confidence that was once lost beforehand. 

These 3 capacities lead to the unraveling of the 3 cardinal virtues of emotional maturity which are Communication, Trust and Vulnerability. These 3 cardinal virtues were gifted to us during our warm and nourishing childhood by our respective parents. But if it is the other way around, we must learn these 3 essential virtues arduously as adults. This situation can be in comparison to learning a new foreign language. The difference would be if the language is inherently learned by birth and childhood, or that it should be learned in the years to come. 

This comparison will not cause us to be embarrassed with our ignorance. Furthermore, this will lead us to be well-versed because of our heavy foundation of emotional literacy around the company of adults. Thus, going back to the emotional literacy school for about a number of hours in our daily life is something that we should not be ashamed of, but rather, this will relatively bring us to the complete attainment of emotional maturity in our adulthood in the long run. 

A Commentary on the Video 

The video is both impactful and influential. It is impactful because it points out heavily on how an emotionally mature person works and functions in different life-based scenarios and situations. On the other hand, it is influential because the viewers who would watch the video can take a cue on how to shut down that emotionally immature characteristic of theirs and make a 360 degree turn in developing their inner spirit of emotional maturity within. The people will be in agreement to the video on the premise of walking into the direction of versatile emotional literacy. On the contrary, the people will be in disagreement with the video, if the specific viewer is in deep refusal to accept change and transformation within. Furthermore, some points to consider in watching the video is on how to deal both with the emotionally mature individual and with the emotionally immature individual, as well as the causes of being such and on how to address these causes for the betterment of the emotionally by nature individuals. 

Other Relevant Information that can be Added to the Video placed in Context and in the Spotlight 

Emotional Immaturity is never impossible to be changed with Emotional Maturity. In order to achieve this transformation as an individual, here are the 10 effective steps and habits on how to achieve maximal and long-lasting emotional maturity as mentioned in relevant articles that places the topic of the video in a highly esteemed pedestal as follows: 

  1. Rehearse on the attainment of your personal goals. 
  2. Obtain daily personal affirmations on keeping an eye on the prize.
  3. Set a parameter of  daily and healthy personal boundaries.
  4. Emphasize the personal ability to pause in certain life scenarios and situations. 
  5. Learn personally to know when to say something in the right timing, in the right situation and in the right scenario that is fit to express such. 
  6. Infuse personally the aspect of emotional maturity to your field of work and profession. 
  7. Personally learn on how to attain behavioral growth. 
  8. Be personable in making best mental, financial and spiritual choices. Never settle for less. 
  9. Be personable in the selection of your friends. If the established friendship is detrimental to your attainment of emotional maturity, then it’s best to put an end to it. 
  10. Be personally engaged in falling in love with a person, and always with the right reasons as a backdrop.